Sunday, August 15, 2010

I want to be in love.

I feel so lonely and empty and sad…so I watch love stories, even those with sad endings. And in those two hours when I’m watching those movies, I am transported into a place where I could almost taste what it feels like to be in love.

I just want to love and to be loved back in return. I want a partner whom I could give my whole heart entirely. I want to love with a love that is like fire—I want the kind of love that hits like lightning. I want to make love with a fierce passion that numbs my mind. I want to cuddle at night and share stories and laughter. I want a kind of love that makes me feel at home and peaceful and contented while at the same time happy and joyful and thankful and full of life and adventure.

I want a love that is strong and wild but slow and easy—a love that is heart and soul, completely! I want to share passion and tenderness. I want a love that is full of trust and honesty, full of understanding and caring.

I just want love, love, love, love!!! I want to love so much!!! I want to show tenderness, I want to care, I want to trust, I want to pamper, I want to cuddle, I want to make love; I just want to love with all my heart, with all my mind, with all my soul, and with all my strength!!!

I want to kiss with wild passion, with sweet tenderness, with love. I want to look at that person in the eye and see my soul in his eyes while his soul reflects in mine. I want to share my life, my thoughts, my dreams, my aspirations, my hopes, my emotions, and my passions.

I want to dance in the rain, I want to play in the field, I want to jump off a cliff, I want to climb a mountain, I want to dive in a waterfall, I want to ride a horse, I want to run barefoot in the sand, I want to count the stars, I want to dine on a hilltop, I want to go on a joyride, I want to fish in the sea, I want to sleep on the grasses beneath the stars, I want to go to art galleries, I want to watch plays and concerts and poetry readings—I just want to live and do all these things with someone I love.

I want to grow old with a person I am in love with—I want to be sitting beside him on a rocking chair in the front porch as we hold hands, listen to soft music, and talk about all our adventures, laugh, and just watch people pass by as they go off to their own adventures.

I have so much romantic love to give but no one to give it to. There seems to be no one worth giving it to because I can only give it to a person I can trust—entirely and completely, in big things as well as in small things.

They say falling in love is like giving your heart to another person and letting him point a gun at it and hoping that he would never pull the trigger. I only have one heart; I could not give it to a person who will only pull the trigger.

I want to trust. I want to love. I want to love, love, love, love, love. I want to be in love…so I watch love stories and in that two hours while I’m watching the movie, I almost feel like I’m really in love. I guess I would just have to be contented with falling in love with the guys in the movies because maybe those kinds of guys and that kind of love could only be found in movies, never in real life.

But if someone would just let me, I could give that someone a kind of love that is like that of the movies.

I want to be in love.

But maybe I would never know how it is to be in love.

I am just a romantic fool—so I’ll just have to watch love stories until I grow old.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Never Too Late

It is never too late to be what you might have been!